Monday, December 19, 2011

How to Lose Weight, Comet Style

Adrenaline junkie? My friend Chelsea went skydiving on her birthday. My uncles used to waterski barefoot. But check this out. A comet, named Lovejoy, took a mad free fall through the sun. As in, it's trajectory was aimed directly at the sun, and it hit the sun, and then came back out the other side. The scientists watching it expected complete vaporization, since the corona of the sun is approximately two million degrees Fahrenheit. Here, watch some videos of it. It looks a bit worse for the wear coming out the other side, don't you think? The comet lost 90% of its weight and it's tail, so this also seems to be a highly effective weight loss program. 

So instead of bungee jumping, how about trying that on your next birthday?

If you don't want to take a mad leap into the sun, how about starting your own space program instead? Billionaire Paul Allen has joined Richard Branson, Elon Musk, and Jeff Bezos in their quest to launch ships into space. Allen has a new idea, which is brilliant: imagine an aircraft carrier. You know, like the boat. Now imagine a spacecraft carrier--but instead of a boat, it's an airplane that launches rockets from the sky. With a wingspan longer than a football field, the airplane should help to cut back on launch costs and delays by launching the rockets wherever conditions are best, as well as giving us safer orbital access to space.

Before you know it they'll be launching rockets to the sun--so all you'll need to do is hitch a ride on one of those, and you can try comet Lovejoy's weight loss program.

Three reasons why comets are awesome:

1. They have plasma tails.
2. They are giant snowballs. With ice. And mud.
3. They are badass, and take mad dives into the sun.

Forget surfing, forget mountain climbing, forget skydiving and bungee jumping, forget theft, forget skateboarding and demolition and tractor pulling and extreme sports in general: just crash a spaceship through the sun's corona. Then you'll be awesome, and have a great body.

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