31 Days of Planets: Teegeeack

Day 17

WARNING: Reading the following text without proper authorization may cause pneumonia.

75 billion years ago, Xenu, the dictator of the Galactic Confederacy (which consisted of 26 stars and 76 planets), was in danger of having his power and authority forcefully taken from him. In an effort to rid the confederacy of extra people, he rounded up several billion people and paralyzed and froze them to capture their souls. They were then loaded onto a spacecraft and transported to the planet Teegeeack, where he had them stacked around volcanoes which were then blown up with hydrogen bombs. All but a few of the aliens died. The souls of those poor unfortunate "extras" exploded into the air and were caught by Xenu's electric ribbon and then brainwashed with misleading information and false identities and released back onto the planet.

What planet is that, again? you ask.

Teegeeack is currently known as Earth.

This, my friends, is Scientology.

In conclusion, now you  may get pneumonia.


Pictures from NASA and scambuster.

A Wish on an Exploding Star

If you wish on an exploding star, do you wishes explode too? Or do your wishes multiply?

A star is quite a fascinating phenomenon. It is a conflagration of interstellar gas and dust, which all collapses into a massive (or tiny, depending on your perspective) ball and starts releasing massive (or tiny) amounts of energy by way nuclear fusion reactions. Hydrogen fuses together in the star's core and forms helium (or He, which is also a pronoun and, when multiplied, an indication of virtual laughter).

The heat and carbon increase continually, until the helium nuclei produce carbon nuclei, and as the heat and temperature continue to increase, other elements are created, until the star consists of layers of seething, fusing, burning elements (which sounds terrifying, to be honest). Eventually, the star creates iron. The iron ignites and burns through all the remaining fuel within the star.

Then the layers collapse into the star at 1/4 the speed of light. The outer shells explode, flying outward into the deep, dark universe, brighter than the billions of stars, brighter than its whole galaxy. Within the star the heat and the elements combine and intersect, and build more and more elements, until the star has birthed all of the ingredients necessary for life. The supernova explodes and spits the elements of life outwards into the vacuum of space, where they dance and mingle with the elements that are already floating about.

BAM.

Happy birthday to us.

So that's why I wish on exploding stars. Because then my wishes come true--and then some.

If you're curious, read more about supernovas.

I am also including the Periodic Table, so you can see all of the exploding star's babies.